Public Indecency and A Fear Overcome, Part 2

Today I enjoyed what felt like a very public shower, while singing "Apples and Bananas" and "I have a lovely bunch of coconuts". Well, the chorus of the second one at least - I never did hear more than the Lion King version 'til tonight (if you don't know what I'm referring to, click here).

"I said... Mu-mpfx, que pasa?!"

Public Indecency and A Fear Overcome

[[Warning: This is a true, dramatic, and PG-13 rated story. No names have been changed to protect innocent booty. Roughly specific times are given for dramatic effect.]]

Back in January, I went to my first Racquetball PE class. Since all we did was go over some basics, I opted to get on one of the ellipticals for 20 minutes and work up a real sweat. Afterwards, I adjourned to the locker rooms for a shower. To my surprise, the showers I found were... open. Six shower heads, one open doorway. Opposite the showers is a mirrored wall for us sassy girls to do our makeup and blow dry our hair. From the mirrors, you can see almost straight into the showers. Fortunately, no one else was around that morning - so I hopped in for an approximately 25.7 second scrub down. Comfort with my body has never been my strong suit.

That night, as I was reflecting on the first day of my second semester of graduate school, I thought of Leslie's experience in Japan going to the baths with one of her former students and that student's mother. These baths are a relaxing place to be experienced in the nude. I thought of my own experiences with my high schoolers. I love them dearly, but I'm hard pressed to imagine a situation with which I'd be less comfortable with them. Impressed by Leslie's confidence and (in my personal opinion) epic bravery, I shared with her my frightening public, very UNrelaxing, "bath" experience, and promised to pluck up my courage, sing a show tune and enjoy a longer shower.

Every day after Racquetball for the past 2+ months, I have hiked up my canary yellow towel and grinned as I choose a Broadway-inspired selection on my march from my locker down to the showers. Amazingly, it wasn't until this Wednesday that anyone was actually in the shower with me. As I turned into the recessed chamber, another girl followed after me and took the shower head across from mine. "Bring it on!," I thought to my self-consciousness, like a poker player raising the stakes in a bluff. I turned on the water, flung the towel over the rail, hummed my Broadway tune... and beat my previous 25.7 seconds stand. 93.2 seconds in, another girl game in and took the shower head down from mine. Both of them stayed in their bathing suits, though one did pull hers down to rinse off. "Ha!" I laughed, humming faster and keeping my huddled body turned to the wall. "They don't have a naked best friend on their side to give them confidence!" (Yes, I'm aware of how perfectly lesbian I sound. I don't care.) I finished, toweled off, and carried on with my day.

Friday, I had some extra time in my day after a meeting with my Soil Chemistry lab group and professor, so I stopped by the gym for 35 minutes on the elliptical (score one for increased cardiovascular fitness!). When I went back to the locker room, I noticed a scale down the hall (this is a large place, mind you). "What the heck, no one's around," I decided, and traipsed my way down to weigh in. Down 9.5 pounds from that first day of Racquetball. Humming whitely something about how good it feels to be a gangsta, I turned and noticed something white fluttering down another hall. "That's odd," and, for the second time in a minute, "What the heck, no one's around, I'll check it out."

There's a row of personal showers with shower curtains.

For the exposure and confusion of the women who have witnessed my self confidence build at their eyeballs' expense, my profound apologies.

6928 miles

I lost my passport and only discovered it Friday night, when I was supposed to leave Saturday morning. Just 6928 miles and a passport separate me from Leslie and Tokyo. It would be difficult to describe the 'missed connection' that I would have to post on Craigslist to sum up the emotional disconnect I've been having this week. I have started the process of getting my government issued identification back, which should all arrive within the next two months. That's put me up for Japan in...May! As Mr. Gartenberg told Mom, I'll get to look forward to it twice.

I've decided that, past my own irresponsibility for not checking on my passport a month ago, there is a reason for me not going to Japan this week. I'm convinced that there is some experience that I am supposed to have here, or not to have there, this week. I don't know if I'll be able to recognize it, or if it is one of those "butterfly effect" sort of moments that I will never be able to put my finger on, but I am convinced that it will happen.

That said, my Spring Break so far? Sleeping, working on GIS assignments for after the break, cleaning up from the frantic tearing apart of my apartment with Mike looking for said passport, getting lunch and spending time with Jaimie and the twin girls she nannies for, Thursday is craft night at An's, and on Friday, I'll be spending all day in "Mrs. Junior's" kindergarten classroom playing 'teacher's assistant assistant'. If anyone has any insight, or added ideas for what to do with my time, I'd love to hear them!

Coincidence

"Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous."
- Albert Einstein, "The World As I See It"

Ash Wednesday

"The only antidote for the temptations of life is a constant turning to God, as Jesus did in the wilderness, grounded in a constant recognition that apart from God, even the greatest gifts can become demonic." From Lenten Meditation Guide, Higher Education Ministries

Today is Ash Wednesday, which marks the beginning of the 40 days before Good Friday, when Christians begin making spiritual preparations for Easter. During the season of Lent (from the Old English: Lenten, meaning 'spring'), the traditional spiritual practice is to give up a vice that stands as a roadblock in your faith, and to replace it with something that brings you closer to God.

Candice R. led a thought provoking activity at youth group Sunday night, and got us to really think about what we would be replacing our vices with. She talked about a friend at Duke who gave up drinking anything but water. The purpose of this was, every time she took a drink of water, she reflected on water in the Christian faith - from the story of the Great Flood, to the sacrament of baptism.

I think there is something wonderful about this practice - every time you have a craving for a regular part of your life (e.g. coffee, for the coffee addict), you are turning your mind instead to God, your eyes to the heavens. Of course, on day 3, those eyes may be accusatory and your mind may well be dreaming of all the things you could do if only you were caffeinated.

I bring this up because, though I have never regularly given something up for Lent, I disappointed to be unable to think of something that I'm truly addicted to this year. I considered caffeine, but abandoned that in light of the fact that, most days, it's the only thing able to keep me awake long enough to pray.

I've decided that, this year, I'm giving up time. Not having enough of it on any given day drives me crazy, whether it's for homework, reading papers, teaching, grading, responding to e-mails, or even getting time to myself. So I'm going to take 15 minutes of each day for forty days to be in silent prayer and meditation. This is not an "obvious" temptation, like alcohol, drugs or sexuality, but socially-acceptable one. While there is nothing wrong with striving for understanding of the world around us, there is something wrong (and ironic to a scientist) with bypassing the miracles for the mundane, getting so involved in the minutia of our lives that we miss the "big picture".

Like the smoker trying to quit, it is going to take a lot of practice to be still in the middle of a busy life. Isn't that the point of Lent, though? To remind us that, sometimes, life is tough, for good reason. We were so unwilling and unable to give up our sinful ways that the Son of God had to die in order for us to truly live. Isn't it only right to give up a bad habit, and try out a good one, with the new life we have been given?

My question for those of you reading is this: What are the obvious temptations in your life? What are the socially acceptable ones? And what are you doing about them?

Ages and Angels

At the head of a tearful throng gathered at Lincon's deathbed, Secretary of War Edwin Stanton reportedly remarked, "now he belongs to the ages." Or did he say "angels"? Witnesses never agreed, and historians have turned handsprings searching evidence for one view or the other. Beyond mere antiquarian interest lies a philosophical problem: was Stanton offering an orthodox and sentimental prayer, or a knowing paean to Lincoln's own deist fatalism? - from Matthew Battles' review of "Angels and Ages: A Short Book about Darwin, Lincoln, and Modern Life", by Adam Gopnik

Which would you choose to be lamented during your eulogy - do you belong to the ages, or the angels? Do we each belong to one, or do we all belong to both?